Your Favourite Sleuth?

Hi!

I have consumed an insane amount of mystery books during my entire life. They have been my faithful companions for a long time. I have buried my nose in numerous pages of 名探偵コナン. I have read several Nancy Drews and all the other novels featuring young snoops such as The Famous Five and The Secret Seven (all Enid Blyton's books). I never read any Hardy Boys, though. I have flipped countless pages of Christie's works. I have read all of her published mystery novels in Indonesian during my senior high school. And Christie is a gateway novel to other detective novels. I devoured so many Sherlocks afterwards, which was easy because most of them are short stories anyway.

And once I became confident enough of my English (as recent as 9 years ago), my reading selection became far wider. I read Sayers, tried Ellery Queen (didn't work - he is too obnoxious - one can only stand fixed amount of boastings an allusions to old gods), Bradley, McCall Smith, Charlaine Harris, and many more. I found awesome Scandinavian thrillers and love most of them. I like the ones by Lackberg, Fossum, and Lars Kepler. I am a big fan of JD Robb. And one day I stumbled upon Erle Stanley Gardner and he opened the floodgate that is love to all things hardboiled and/or noir. I am fond of his detectives. The tough, bulldog, slick yet honest attorney Perry Mason and his spirited sidekick cum secretary Della, the DA Doug Selby, and the unlikely pair Donald Lam and Brenda Cool. After that, I discovered Chandler and fell in love so hard with him. I like Spillane a lot as well. On a brighter note, I like Vish Puri series by Tarquin Hall, Nury Vittachi's Feng Shui Detective, and Mr. Monk. Going local, I absolutely enjoy V. Lestari and S. Mara Gd's works. It's a pity they publish so rarely in between and so few.

In total, I have read a lot of mystery novels and most of their plots are still perfectly etched on my brain. Whoever can forget Robert Ackroyd? Or Murder in Orient Express? Or the extremely twisted tale of NatFrom all the sleuths, I will try to single out seven of my most favourite sleuths. It is very difficult to select just seven and even more difficult to categorize them according to my favouritism towards them. I can mention twenty, easy, as long I don't need to categorize them. Basically, I like them with almost same amount of affection.

1. Hercule Poirot

My number one favourite, all the time. He might be just a snobbish, cocky, cranky Belgian little man, but he still has the first place in my heart. I fervently refuse to believe that he meets his end in Curtain and I vowed never to read Curtain before the day my I am going to meet mine. I always hoped that he will hook up with Countess Vera Rosakoff, but apparently it is impossible to happen. That's a pity, but I imagine it will be quite hellish to spend 24/ 7 with Poirot and 24/ 7 with Vera as well. His love to all things geometric and sanitary sometimes doesn't make any sense at all, and of course it can drive any roommate insane. And Vera can be sometimes too unpredictable and easily swayed to the more exciting way of life, a.k.a. criminal life.

Among her creations, Poirot is one that Christie dislikes the most. But, much to her dismay, Poirot is her most famous creation. She vented out her dislike in the persona of Ariadne Oliver - it's very apparent that Ariadne Oliver is her parallel in character construction aspect. Madame Oliver's creation that catapults her to great fame, much to her regret, is an eccentric, vegetarian Finnish Sven Hjerson. Madame Oliver often laments her decision to make him Finnish and vegetarian - maybe Dame Christie often lamented her decision to make Poirot Belgian and geometric, decimal-obsessive as well.

2. Sherlock Holmes

He almost tied with Poirot but I decide that after all, I like Poirot better. Poirot’s death surprised me a lot and made me vowed like that. Holmes’ death? Shocking and a bit of, isn’t that 残念, but that’s the extent. And he didn't really die after all. From all the existing versions of Holmes, my favourite, character-wise, is the original Arthur Conan Doyle created.

He might be an opium-, cigar-addicted annoying man with an ever-changing mood, but they can be forgiven considering his insane gifts. Good at brawling, having seemingly photographic memory, and insanely perceptive - I'd kill for those talents. When he is beaten by Irene Adler, I was a tad disappointed because he is the Sherlock Holmes and he is beaten by an... an... opera singer! Granted, a very clever opera singer, but still! A man who almost always outsmarts the Napoleon of Crime, is beaten by an opera singer!

Anyway, if you wonder who is my favourite Holmes physique-wise...

Me?

Yes. You! It is a real shame they make the storyline all modern and do not adhere to the canon! I bet Benedict Cumberbatch would look real good and yummy if he was dressed in the appropriate costume for the appropriate era where the original Holmes set. And the title A Study in Pink almost made me cry with frustration. Why can't you just stick to the original and deliver them properly? And why should you make Moriarty extra-gay? Why?

And while we are on it, the Holmes version I absolutely hate with passion is Laurie R. King's version where he marries a girl named Mary Russell. Lady. Creativity and improvisation are good, but this is too far. I am okay with BBC modernisation although I personally still think it is a bit stupid. I am fine when Robert Downey Jr. portrays him as punch-happy muscular playboy. I am good with Elementary which insists that John Watson is Joan Watson and Moriarty is a mother. I am even dandy with Alan Bradley trying to convince readers that he has a pair of working ovaries instead of balls, BUT I AM NOT OKAY WHEN SOMEONE TRIES TO MARRY HIM TO A GIRL LIKE MARY RUSSELL. It is just so wrong! Holmes is too soppy and sentimental in those novels. It is as if the author makes a completely different character and slaps the name Holmes on it because she wants to ride on Holmes' fame or... I cannot think of another reason.

And if Sherlock ever marries? It will sure as hell not to a girl like Mary Russell. She is too sharp-mouthed and needy at times. The real Sherlock will never be able to put up with her. A woman that he likes and respects is a woman that can hold herself up and survive in any kinds of condition, I think. He has little time for sentiments and all that stuff.

PS: They say that the next season will have an episode set in the Conan Doyle's original time period! YAY!

3. 工藤新一　（コナン江戸川）

Both the hottest and coolest sleuth ever. An eternal high school (or elementary school, depends on your perspective) student, this boy is an intelligent smartass. It is such a pity that he has to be trapped in a small boy body for so long. I wish he will get his normal body soon. The duration he is spending trapped in Conan body is the same duration my body spent to develop from a skinny little girl’s body to not-so-skinny more mature girl body.

About love life, I'd rather he ends up with 宮野志保 since they both live the consequences of crossing the Black Organization so that they can understand each other well. Personality-wise, they are quite a match. 毛利欄 is nice, kind, and all, but there will always be parts of 新一's life she won't be quite able to understand. So I am shipping verily hard for 工藤ー宮野 ending!

About the live action adaptation... I really like 溝端順平's version. It is not perfect because nobody can be worthy enough to portray 工藤, but he's good enough, I think. As for Conan, I think there is an expiration period for his fangirling because a 40-something woman having a crush on a high school student, albeit fictitious, is a bit... creepy and unhealthy.

4. Phryne Fisher

Rags-to-riches, a true feminist, and blessed with good looks and good taste from everything from good liquor to fine young men. She sure is the royal I am fond of the most. I'd like to be a passenger in her Hispano-Suiza when she drives. It sure will be an unforgettable experience.

I watched the series adaptation before reading the books. Before I read the books, I thought the series is awesome. After reading the novels, I feel that the series ruins the story because of so many reasons. First, they try to make Phryne monogamous to Jack Robinson. Pffft. Phryne? Monogamous? So not going to happen.

Dalliances, dalliances. Dilly-dally.

And to Jack Robinson. It will be more plausible to use Lin Chung instead of Jack Robinson, but they don't do it, maybe because they still hold quite conservative views. Second, Essie Davis is an awesome actress, but she is too old to be Phryne. It shows.

Phryne is supposed to be in her late twenties, not early fourties. Sorry, Essie. This is a touchy subject. You are gorgeous and I have nothing against aging women, mainly because I am a woman and will experience the same thing, but it will be better if actresses portraying characters are in the same age span as the characters, or at least, look as if they are in the same age bracket. Third, they avoid the whole 'Phryne becomes Lin Chung's concubine' thing. Good heavens, why? That's the thing that makes this series interesting, for God's sake. Fourth, they decide to give Phryne the standard past baggage in form of a dead younger sister (Janey) who was killed by a man who is presently incarcerated. He and Phryne have the standard relationship of 'taunter and tauntee'. Fifth is still related to fourth - they altogether exclude Phryne's original sister in the books, the sapphic socialist Lady Eliza.

Sigh. It's like seeing a cobra defanged or a cat declawed.

5. Philip Marlowe

Ah. I have made a whole post about my adulation and adoration to him. Should he be the number one?

No.

It is a place Poirot won since a long time ago. If only I met Marlowe first… Maybe the story would be different.

6. Tommy and Tuppence

I really like this feisty, plucky British couple. Of these two, Tuppence is the driving energy, while Tommy is more like the rein to constantly hold his sometimes reckless wife back. Amongst all the stories that feature them, my favourite is strangely the short stories collection.They work together really well in that book, with the constant amount of hilarity and healthy amount of competition between those two as well. The funny thing is because there are, if I recall correctly, twelve cases, in the end they tie because Tuppence is right in six out of twelve and Tommy in the other half.

7. Lord Peter Wimsey

Blessed with riches, working brain, sharp tongue, an ability to distinguish wine and dress immaculately, and decent look, Peter Wimsey is a very endearing character indeed. It helps a lot that he is British. I am weak for British boys. And if they’re royalties… Let’s just say, mmmMMMMMM. He has an issue with PTSD, though. Luckily, his manservant, Bunter, is always ready beside him to help him whenever anything arises. Wimsey's mother, the Dowager Duchess of Denver (as someone has said, delicious alliteration) is every bit as clever and funny as her youngest son is. And their family has the awesomest coat of arms ever.

It is a nice motto, isn't it?

To top it, he has the most badass full name I've ever encountered.

Peter Death Bredon Wimsey.

Wheeeee!

So here I end my list! How about you? Who is your favourite sleuth, so far?

#wideshoot